Choosing Curiosity Over Manifestation

A resolution of sorts + some prompts for using curiosity to get what you want

Praised and Confused - Grace Lee, 2023

This year, curiosity is a word I’m meditating on. When I made my 2025 vision board, I was drawn to the words “Look. Look.” that I found in a magazine. The words called to me. Yes, look. Search. I feel a sudden sense of urgency more than ever before to practice the art of intrigue, to look, to ask questions, to write down.

I realize that there’s a certain comfort we feel in the idea of receiving. That’s why manifestation is such a popular buzzword every time the new year comes around. An article published in The Crimson about Manifestation TikTok talks about how the buzziness of the word increased alongside the communal feeling of uncertainty we felt 5 years ago:

“In 2020, Google searches for “manifesting” increased by 400 percent. The perceived autonomy that manifestation grants, assuring that our wishes do not have to stop at thought but may appear in our real lives, is understandably a refreshing change from the incessant distress of the news.” - Chelsie Lim

While the idea of visualization is something I use from time to time, I’ve been wondering if that’s the best tool I have in my arsenal when it comes to getting what I want. I’ve always enjoyed practicing it in theory but I dont’ think I ever really do it right or opt into it completely. Because sitting back and visualizing and waiting has never been my style. Which I know has drawbacks as well, such as a general feeling of anxiety and stress of constantly going after something and feeling depleeted afterwards.

And I wonder if we can do both? Sit back, wait, but also continue to look up and stay interested.

Because the last thing I want is to believe so deeply that what I want is coming that I stop practicing intrigue.

And I guess that’s the core of my pondering here: I worry when manifestation stops us from being curious. Because it often frames everything as being promised to us — what a powerful notion, indeed! But what happens when we start getting the things we wanted so easily that we stop searching for what we didn’t think we needed?

In other words, I’m not even saying manifestation doesn’t work. I’m saying, maybe we shouldn’t be using it that much because it may take something away in the process.

I won’t lie, this idea was partially planted in my head by — what else? — a TikTok video. I was recently going through a bunch of my saved posts, archiving them on my phone and one of the first folders I prioritized was the one titled “WISE WORDS” — a collection of advice and words of wisdom that I want to refer back to.

As I was reviewing, a video that struck me was a simple format; text over screen with a girl sitting on a bus with headphones on. The text read:

“Manifestation is fun, but have you tried rapturous curiosity and opennness to what will happen, about which you have no slightest idea?” —

Vafa Vekendra

I think this idea spoke to me for a couple of reasons. For one, I feel that I’ve made my peace with the unkown because it can contain more abundance for life than the “known” sometimes does. Why are we so scared of these empty spaces that we don’t know how to fill? If only we could take the first step forward to at least try and fill them, we’ll see that manifestation may not even be needed.

Second, I feel that in a way, manifestation can’t exist without curiosity. Because I think the overlapping word here is “openness.” You can’t attract or manifest if you’re not open. And you can’t chase or follow your curiousity without openness. The key is to not close yourself off, no matter what form you think your destiny will arrive to you.

And maybe I’m misunderstanding the idea of “attract don’t chase,” but isn’t the chase the best part at times? But sure, the “chase” makes it sound chaotic, stressful — you’re in high pursuit towards the object of desire. This leads to burnout, emotional depletion and resentment towards the work you do (whoops, am I calling myself out here?) So maybe it needs to be the word “search” or even simply “look.” You can attract. You can search. You can do both if you’d like but you can’t do either if you’re not open to the often finnicky nature of life and all the surprises it most definitely has in store for you.

And one thing I’ve seen and experienced in my own life, is that along with the magic of life comes the math of it. Yes, you read that right. Because I truly believe that statistically speaking, the more you put yourself out there, search for things, take steps forward and say “yes” when it feels right, you really will start to attract things you never even realized could be possible.

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When you search the art of manifestation, you get handed lots of prompts and affirmations. So I’ve been trying to curate my own list for this slightly inverted version towards getting the things I desire. You can write these down, keep them in your notes app, on a sticky note, etc. Here are some I’ve been sitting with:

1. Carry a notebook with you at all times. Allow it to be messy. It should serve as a net that catches any questions, ideas or curiosities you have.

2. Keep a running list on your phone or notebook of things you want to deep dive into later if you don’t have time in the moment. This could range from everything and anything (don’t limit yourself to whatever is in your creative niche or career. For example, my most recent ones are: brutalist architecture, Hypatia of Alexandria and Nicole Kidman’s relationship with Tom Cruise.

3. Before dismissing or accepting something, take a double take.

4. On your morning or evening walk in your neighborhood, locate three things that you’re drawn to for any reason. Write them down and then later pick at least one to deep dive into in some way (by redrawing the thing, going down a Wikipedia rabbit hole, etc.)

5. When talking to someone, encourage and remind yourself to ask at least 3 follow up questions about something they said.

6. Talk to strangers. Make the first move — and I don’t just mean romatically but platonically and professionally, too. Do it digitally through a cold DM or in person at a bar or restaurant. My tip? Always start with a sincere compliment and go from there. Or better yet, a question!

If you’re reading this, I appreciate you so so much! I also have a podcast that I’d love for you to listen/watch if that’s your thing. If you have any questions or ponderings about style and life, submit to my advice column here! Also: you can shop my closet here and follow me on Instagram and TikTok.